I went to the doctor on 3/2; I decieded to go to lunch early to give me time to arrive to the appointment on time. I was informed my Cancer has returned! With the news I got it was obvious I would not be returning back to work. I was and still am devastated, I called my boss and asked for permission to go home. I got home and cried for hours, took a xanix to calm down; it helped because I slept all day. I slept from 11:30am-8:00pm when American idol was on. I then got up ate something and went back to sleep to come into work the next morning.
At work I could not concentrate I have so many things on my mind. My home just flooded a month ago and is still not even in the process of being fixed and now my health is at risk once more. I guess I can’t really do anything but do exactly what I am told to do by the doctors and wish and strive for me to be able to fight this once more like I did before.
I am very disappointed, but there is nothing I can do to change it. All I can do is pray and hope for the best. My little Alex doesn’t know yet, I am going to keep it on the low until the time of surgery because I don’t want him to go down hill emotionally again; he is now doing so well coping with his father passing away. I am so scared to leave him alone. I am not afraid of death anymore, what I am afraid of is leaving my only son little and without a parent; he already lost his father in 2009 and I am so afraid of not being there for him. I ask for your prayers to help me fight this terrible illness. Thank you.
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Psalm 27:1
"The Lord is my light and my salvation – whom shall I fear?The Lord is the stronghold of my life – of whom shall I be afraid?"Psalm 27:1
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I'm so sorry, Cristina. I'm praying things go smoothly. I don't think it would be a bad idea to talk to Alex about it, because I think it would be a good dialogue between you two. Have you thought about going to therapy together? I know my little sister goes with here mom and asks a lot of questions that she wouldn't normally ask if it were just the two of them.
ReplyDeleteIt'll all be okay!
I'm sorry to hear this, girl!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't believe it!!!!!!! :*(
ReplyDeleteWhat is the next step? What's going to happen? WHAT DO YOU NEED??????!!