Status of life occurrences...

So life has not been so easy lately. The seller whom I did my real estate contract to purchase my home kept all of the monies from the insurance and my home has not been fixed from the flood that the frozen pipes caused back on February 2nd occurred. With all I am dealing with emotionally and physically with my cancer it has caused more stress on my life. I had to hire an attorney which I had never ever in my life had to do.

I don’t understand how people can be so fake and so cruel. I am living in a home that is not livable, getting ready to have an important surgery due to my cancer and knowing all these issues she still didn’t care and did all this to me. I guess it’s hard to believe there are people so hurtful in this world when I myself would never do that to anyone especial not to anyone in need.

God will do justice on her and with time she will pay for her do’s, until then lets just hope that my attorney can make her pay some do’s here on earth for now. I don’t like to fight, but I never give up! I will fight till the end for justice and to survive.

I wanted to do a little party for Alexandro for his 10th birthday in May at the house, but with all this going on I guess it will not be possible. At times I don’t even know what to feel if to choose life or death, then I wake up and think about my little Alex, he needs me. A lot of things have happened in such a little time and I still don’t know how to cope with so many problems God tests me with. I still miss Chuy a lot and think about him every single day. It may seem sad, but I have actually given up on love, I will never love again. I have a BF, but I will never be able to love him with the strength and passion that I still love Chuy with.

So on Monday 18th finally my consult with the surgeon; I am almost sure my surgery will be on the Friday 22nd. The 19th is open too, but its @ Kaseman the other hospital is where I had my other surgery’s and didn’t turn out to well, so I want to have it @ the main Presbyterian hospital were I work at. Let’s see what she says on Monday. I am kind of nervous, if you are a previous reader as you know I died in 2005 after a surgery I had to remove a brain tumor! Life is always in God’s hands and he decides whether to keep us here to continue learning or take us to rest in peace! Thanks for reading; I needed to VENT a little!!! God bless and have a wonderful day.